poetfreak

is there such a thing as forever?

when do you give up on pursuing someone who has fallen out of love? how do you hold on to promises said but was never done..

how do you start to build another life after everything has crumbled and all this time you have thought you were building a foundation for a beautiful and stable future?

when they say it is over, is it really over?

can you still fight for a fight, he said he has already won?

is it cowardice to give up and succumb to reality?

how can something so beautiful end in such a misery?

why do we ask ourselves, where did i go wrong, if we have given it all without asking for anything?

why does love sometimes become unrequitted? why cant people meet at some point and agree to love each other with all honesty for the rest of their life?

when you have been hurt a lot of times, when rejection is becoming a pattern, when do you cease to adore someone who cant appreciate you back?

why does pain in pair with love?

why do others sleep with the person they love most and others do not?

is it because they are more beautiful and some are less?

is it because they are richer?

is it because they are better?

i need to know why...

they are asking me why i am still not in a serious relationship..

i had my share of mistakes, i know..

is that because i am weak or because i am too strong to take on a road unknown?

poetfreak

the past still haunts me, the evil twin has made himself known through subtle conversations between a couple of beers and cigarettes. he has managed to build himself a vivid image that either merges or divides that original person i humbly adore and the one that i am starting to appreciate.

at the beginning, he was just like him, a mountain unconquerable from afar, its height, its mystery were immeasurable. but then patience paid off and endurance blessed. the once unknown, unscaled trail is finally giving a trace of habitation. because of that urge to discover the sound of silence, i persevered the augmenting days of listening to just anything, even to some intangible ideas. in the middle of the agonizing walk amidst tall, itchy grasses, suddenly my body failed to recognize the difference between walking along and walking alone. it has shifted to being one with the trees, the muddy path, the rocks, the air that i breathe. it has shifted to being one with you.

confused with how it has become to begin as it is , i forced myself to kneel down, asked for something that i have never dared to ask before and that is to conquer that mountain, to overcome all the obstacles then eventually become peacefully in one with that nature i so long to be a partner with not only because of the elevation it provides but because this one does not laugh at the lowly me, instead the defeaning silence cuddles me to rest, sings me a lullaby in tune with the beat of my heart, making me live, making me breathe again.

why am i still paying a debt that was never owed? i have strived to detach myself from the earthly things that gave a sense of emptiness uncurable , yet end in the end it still was not enough. yes, no matter how i tried , there seems to be something missing, a piece of the puzzle that does not fit.

i prayed for you , Evil Twin.

but until such time that i realize that you are more that just a fleeting replica of a love once lost, then i shall be just a shadow walking with you.